In what archaeologists are calling “a mostly well-intentioned case of theft by stupidity,” a tourist from the United States has returned several ancient Roman artifacts to the National Roman Museum in Italy, proving once again that time heals all wounds, especially when accompanied by postage and a guilty mind.
The anonymous Floridian, who allegedly decided to spice up their Italian vacation years ago by pocketing a few shards of Roman history, mailed back two fragments of marble and one piece of ancient pottery along with a heartfelt letter expressing remorse. The missive, written with all the regret and none of the punctuation of someone who recently discovered guilt, confessed to taking the items during a visit and begged forgiveness from both the museum and the “great Roman spirits.” The syntax was apparently closer to high school diary than classical Latin, but the sentiment came through loud and clear: oops.
The National Roman Museum’s director, Stéphane Verger, seemed more bemused than angry at the return, noting that the relics were not exactly showstoppers in their collection. One might describe them as “historically relevant yet dramatically underwhelming,” which in museum terms means they wouldn’t even be sold in the gift shop as paperweights. Still, Verger appreciated the gesture and filed the items properly, presumably somewhere near the “I can’t believe someone stole this” drawer.
Cases of remorseful looters returning artifacts are, perhaps surprisingly, not uncommon. In fact, Italian museums have received several such packages in recent years, often accompanied by notes citing curses, misfortunes and various other cosmic mishaps, suggesting that stealing antiquities may have a strangely karmic shelf life.
Authorities have said they do not plan to charge the individual, citing the minor value of the artifacts and the fact that owning up to it in writing was both legally inadvisable and incredibly honest. There may be hope for humanity yet, especially the kind that mails back history with apologies.
Apparently, what happens in Rome doesn’t always stay there forever.