In a story that surprised absolutely no one except perhaps the protagonist himself, Adam Neumann, the once-and-future face of corporate overconfidence, has emerged from a brief hiatus to officially express interest in repurchasing the smoking remains of WeWork, the very company he famously steered into a wall while shouting “We’re revolutionizing office space!”
Mr. Neumann, best known for transforming shared desks into a $47 billion hallucination, is reportedly “in talks” to buy back what’s left of WeWork after it filed for bankruptcy in November, which is perhaps the business equivalent of setting your own house on fire and then trying to buy it back from the fire department. With the help of Andreessen Horowitz and a loose pile of investor enthusiasm one could generously describe as “optimistic,” Neumann’s potential rescue plan has neither been confirmed nor wholly endorsed by the company’s current leadership, who are understandably wary of familiar faces bearing familiar PowerPoint decks.
WeWork’s new management, having spent the past year attempting to convince both landlords and reality that it is, in fact, still a business, offered a carefully worded response that can be roughly translated to “Thanks but also absolutely not.” Meanwhile, Neumann claims to have made “multiple attempts” to engage with WeWork about a buyback, or at least start a public narrative that he’s trying heroically to return, cape fluttering, to the scene of a crime he insists was actually a grand vision cut short by haters with basic financial literacy.
In a customary plot twist that feels extremely on brand, Neumann has managed to make bankruptcy feel like a networking opportunity, leveraging it as a backdrop for his own redemption arc. What better time to talk comeback plans than when the office plant is still emitting smoke?
“WeWork is a brand that’s bigger than any individual,” said the company’s spokesperson, clearly hoping that no individuals would take this as an open invite.
As for the current landlords, creditors and other stakeholders involved, they find themselves once again gripping the edges of their chairs as the man who once sold communal workspaces as a spiritual experience now angles to buy back the keys he lost in the fire he started. There is no official word yet on whether sage and kombucha will be included in this new proposal.
It turns out that when you call a business a “lifestyle” long enough, someone tries to secure a sequel.