In a scene that could have been lifted directly from a low-budget action film or perhaps a very confused GPS instruction manual, a 30-year-old man from Oregon was arrested after leading police on a high-speed chase before attempting to hide his pickup truck inside a Home Depot. Yes, you read that correctly — inside, as in beyond the automatic doors and just past the seasonal patio display.
The man, whose name was not released by authorities because apparently the embarrassment was punishment enough, reportedly stole a truck in Sandy, Oregon, which is already a rather picturesque place to begin a crime spree. What followed was a car chase that wound its way through several towns and at least one person’s very bad morning commute. Having exhausted the well-known hiding spots such as alleyways, forested areas and anywhere else not brightly lit and filled with fluorescent lighting, the suspect made a bold move to park his stolen vehicle inside a Home Depot in Wood Village. It is unclear whether he was looking for an impromptu garage or simply urgently needed to remodel a bathroom.
Deputies from the Multnomah County Sheriff’s Office were understandably less than impressed. They followed the suspect into the store and arrested him, proving that Home Depot’s promise of providing everything you need under one roof extends even to fugitive apprehension. No injuries were reported, although a few garden gnomes are now in therapy.
The store, to its credit, remained open throughout much of the ordeal because apparently nothing gets between Americans and discounted mulch. Shoppers were only slightly inconvenienced, with some likely assuming the whole scene was an over-the-top seasonal promotion or a particularly immersive Father’s Day ad campaign.
The suspect now faces charges including unauthorized use of a motor vehicle, criminal mischief and what one can only assume will be a lifetime ban from at least one home improvement retailer.
He drove into aisle seven looking for a getaway and found law enforcement instead — talk about an unexpected in-store pickup.