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World’s Oldest Living Dog Passes Away, Experts Confirm He Was, In Fact, Quite Old

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In a tragic blow to octogenarian canines everywhere and those who love them, Bobi, officially recognised by Guinness World Records as the oldest living dog ever recorded, has passed away at the ripe old age of 31 years and 165 days, which in human terms might be somewhere between “remarkably sprightly centenarian” and “oh dear, how is he still going?”.

Born on May 11, 1992, in the charming countryside of Portugal, Bobi spent his record-breaking life in the quiet village of Conqueiros where, by all reports, he lived a thoroughly peaceful existence likely involving naps, food, more naps and the occasional stroll for dramatic flair. He belonged to the Costa family, who appear to have cracked the code on canine longevity, likely involving a lack of packaged snacks and an abundance of fresh air and household adoration.

Bobi was a purebred Rafeiro do Alentejo, a breed known for watching over livestock and apparently also calendars. The average lifespan for these dogs is about 12 to 14 years, which means Bobi wildly ignored expectations the way most of us ignore treadmill instructions.

Veterinarian Dr. Karen Becker, who met Bobi just a few months before his passing, suggested that his diet of unprocessed, human-grade food, regular outdoor activity and a stress-free environment contributed to his extraordinary lifespan. It also probably helped that he lived in a quiet village and not, say, a New York apartment building full of sirens, anxiety and takeout containers.

While there will never be another Bobi, at least not one who outlives three decades and lives to see more Portuguese governments than some humans, his legacy will live on in veterinary textbooks and the kind of Guinness World Records entries that leave other pet owners quietly side-eyeing their dogs and whispering, “Don’t get any ideas”.

As one furry chapter closes, it’s a good time to reflect on life’s big questions, like what Bobi knew about surviving three decades that we don’t.

Turns out the secret to eternal youth may just be skipping the kibble and avoiding existential dread.

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