The Smithsonian’s National Zoo is once again preparing for the not-so-stealthy arrival of giant pandas, a species best known for doing very little very slowly. After a brief panda-less interlude caused by the expiration of the loan agreement with China, the zoo is set to receive a fresh pair of black-and-white ambassadors who presumably remain unaware they are the fuzzy faces of international diplomacy.
The new duo, Bao Li and Qing Bao, boast bloodlines that would make any royal family envious. Bao Li is the grandson of Mei Xiang and Tian Tian, the beloved pair who racked up years of napping, snacking, and narrowly avoiding exercise on the National Zoo stage. Qing Bao, meanwhile, hails from the Chengdu Research Base in China, a breeding ground for pandas and, one suspects, panda-related paperwork.
This upcoming repatriation of bamboo-chomping celebrities follows a temporary panda extinction on the East Coast, which left panda enthusiasts clutching their stuffed animal merch with only photos and memories to snack on. Their return is part of a renewed agreement with the China Wildlife Conservation Association, proving relations can still be warm when fur is involved.
The timing of the panda drop, set for later this year, coincides with the 50th anniversary of panda diplomacy. It’s hard to say whether Qing Bao and Bao Li are aware that they are technically small, adorable diplomats, but judging by their likely itinerary of chewing, lounging, falling off things, and more chewing, it is entirely possible they will leave foreign policy to the adults.
Zoo officials say plans are underway to prepare special accommodations for their guests, who reportedly have several demands including high-quality bamboo, enrichment toys, and the right to sleep through public attention with zero guilt. All of which seems fair considering they have to look endearing for the better part of a decade with millions watching and zero privacy.
With their arrival, Washington D.C. not only regains its cherished panda paparazzi targets but also reacquires a powerful soft power tool wrapped in a slow-moving monochrome package.
Sometimes diplomacy is best conducted with a yawn, a tumble, and a face full of foliage.

